Decision Made

I don’t feel too comfortable with it, but we’ve decided to go ahead with radiation. Ultimately, I was the only one on the “wait and see” side. Andy felt all along more comfortable following the opinions of the true experts, instead of me (even though I’d like to think of myself as an expert on this topic now since I’ve read all the lterature). I didn’t really want to badger Andy into my way of thinking because if I am wrong, I’d beat myself up for the rest of my life. Andy didn’t really want to make the decision either since he was afraid that if the tumor comes back after radiation, I’d make his life miserable. So, I figured since neither of us wanted to make the decision, we should let the doctors decide. And, although it is a close call, all the doctors all said we should radiate and that they would radiate their own kids in this situation.

Then we had to decide about how we are getting Jude to Indiana next Tuesday for his proton radiation consultation/simulation/mask fitting session. We were thinking of driving together as a family, but he also checked into flights for just him and Jude. We were so worn out from the big decision about radiation that I suggested we just flip a coin for whether we should drive to Indiana as a family or have just Jude and him fly there. Heads won so Andy and Jude are flying to Indiana next Monday, returning Wednesday and I’ll stay behind and work, assuming we arrange a baby sitter for Levi and Asher.

Then we’ll all head to Indiana for almost 7 weeks. I wanted to make a decision about whether we were going to do this radiation thing before asking my employer whether this can be accommodated. I’d certainly try to work as best as I could remotely. Hopefully it won’t be a problem.