Andy & Jessica

There aren’t many posts for March because not a lot happened. Jessica was working very hard to get clients compliant with a law that was to take effect on April 14, 2004. She was working long hours every day, and was busy most weekends. On a typical weekend, we would get together on Friday night and Jess would take a break from work. Examples of things we did on Friday nights in March are: we shopped for a treadmill for Jess, shopped for a bike for Jess, worked on removing wallpaper, and watched movies. Usually on Saturdays, Jess would work at home, and I would hang out at her house while she was working. Sundays, I would go to church in the morning and head back to St. Cloud in the early afternoon. Jess would go to church in the morning and go into work in the afternoon.

Looking back, March was good for us. We developed a lot of patience for each other then. Jess was constantly tired and stressed over work, but still gave me as much time together as she could. I would have liked more time, but understood her work situation, and took what I could get.

Posted: Wednesday, July 21, 2004

On this day (less than 2 months after we met), Andy and I told each other that we love each other. I think I realized I loved him the day before this day. It turns out that he had loved me after dating me for three weeks or something, but figured he should wait to tell me so that I didn’t freak out. So anyway, he could tell something was on my mind and kept asking me what it was. I knew that loving someone is a choice and falling in love is a feeling. So, instead of telling him right away that I loved him, I chose the safer route and said, “I want to love you.” He said something like, “I already do love you.” Andy is so easy to love and I’m so thankful for his love for me.

Posted: Saturday, July 10, 2004

Andy sent me the following email forward on March 3, 2004. Some of it may be inappropriate for younger readers. I think the list works better if you assume that the guy and girl are married. The list is meant as a joke and I think it is pretty funny.
Continue reading “Men’s Rules for a Relationship”

From the very beginning, we both knew that the purpose of our relationship was to see if we should marry each other. Early on, we defined four distinct phases to our relationship. Phase 1 was new friends, just getting to know each other. We were introduced by my good friend Phil, who was dating Jess’ sister Katie (and will marry her Saturday, June 5, 2004). If we decided that we liked each other and wanted to become more serious in our relationship we’d move on to Phase 2. Phase 2 for us is our formal courtship. Phase 2 is being more than just friends and seeking to grow closer as we pursue marriage. It was on this day (February 28th) that we decided to enter Phase 2. Phase 3, when it comes, will be engagement, and Phase 4 will be marriage. We had only known each other for about 6 weeks when we entered into Phase 2, but we were quickly getting to know each other, and liked what we were getting to know. For a few weeks before Phase 2, we knew we were a little more than just friends getting to know each other, even though we weren’t quite courting, so we called our relationship “Phase 1.5”.

Posted: Thursday, June 3, 2004

This is a kind of funny string of emails about me planning to get my first hair cut after starting to date Andy and his emotional response. Andy likes me with long hair, as is sufficiently clear below:

I wrote:

Good morning, Andy!
Well, I’m feeling pretty rested. But, I haven’t fully disclosed the reason why I’m much more rested this week. Yes, partially the [telephone call] curfew. But, also, I’ve been waking up at 6, rather than 5 this whole week and just rushing to get ready. It isn’t going that well though. I almost missed the bus again and I’ve had to wear my hair in pony tails all week because I haven’t had time to do it/dry it. And yesterday I had to wear somewhat wrinkled pants because I didn’t have enough time to finish ironing them. I think I’ll get my hair cut today or tomorrow. For your sake, I won’t let them cut it short. Yeah, your dream last night was strange. I don’t know what’s up with me, but it seems like ever since I met you, I wake up at about 3 a.m. every morning and then I think about you and then fall back asleep.
Hope you have a good day!
Jessica

Here is Andy’s response to me mentioning getting my hair cut:

NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Don’t cut your hair!!!!

Here is my clarification:

Hi Andy,
Sorry to freak you out. Maybe I should have used the word “trimmed.” Andy, I get my hair cut, that is, trimmed, every 6 weeks or so, like clock work. If I don’t get it cut (or trimmed) that often it gets split ends and looks dry and disgusting. I think it is starting to look bad.
Jessica

Andy’s thoughts on women with short hair:

Cut = bad
Trimmed = good

Thanks for clarifying.

What’s especially bad about a girlfriend, or more likely a wife, getting her hair cut short is that it usually comes with the question “do you like it?” If the guy says yes, he’s a liar; if he says no, he’s a jerk. Guys HATE questions that cannot, under any circumstances, have a good response when an honest answer is given. Even worse is the lose-lose situation, where any answer is seen as negative. (Did you stop beating your wife is a good example. Yes means he did stop beating her, no means he is still beating her – there is no room for him never having beaten her)

Posted: Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Here is a string of emails from February 16, 2004:

Andy wrote:

You’re distracting me again.

I replied:

No, Andy, I think it is the other way around. (I was just thinking about you!)

Andy replied:

There she goes.
There she goes again.
Racing through my brain.
And I just can’t contain.
This feeling that remains.

Posted: Wednesday, July 20, 2004

I knew when I agreed to go out on a date with Andy at the end of January that it was a risky move. You see, I was already aware that Valentine’s Day just right around the corner and that it would be awkward with a new relationship. But, just before Valentine’s Day, I realized that I really liked Andy and that we should celebrate this fine national holiday. I had come up with the greatest gift idea for him – the Air Blazers Lego set (builds helicopter and various kinds of planes). I knew Andy would like it because we had discussed how we both played with Legos as kids and about how he has been working on his pilot’s license.

Andy came over to my house the Friday night before Valentine’s Day. We both couldn’t wait to open our gifts until Saturday so we tore into them. I think he went first. Then Andy gave me a heart-shaped box of chocolates to open. I thought that was my only gift. But, he suggested I eat a certain chocolate. Thankfully, I looked at it before I plopped it into my mouth and I realized that a pair of emerald earrings was carefully placed in the carved-out bottom of the chocolate. You may not see me wear those earrings that often because I’m a matchy person and I only wear the emerald earrings with a green shirt. I suppose Andy will also have to buy me rubies, sapphires, etc. so I can fill the holes in my ears on days where I’m wearing red, blue…. Just kidding, sort of.

Here is what Andy had to say about Valentine’s Day on his blog:

I could have used a lot more sleep this weekend, but then there are only 24 hours in a day. Other than that, it was a great weekend. Saturday was the first Valentine’s Day since 1994 that I got to spend with a gorgeous woman (actually, I would say the first ever, the one in 1994 wasn’t gorgeous). We didn’t do much, but we had a great time doing it. We spent several hours baking brownies from scratch, along with making frosting for the brownies from scratch and homemade ice cream. While they all turned out great, it was a lot more work than I expected. But then, it was the activity we were after, not the finished product. We also went to Knuckleheads comedy club at the Mall of America with Vanilla Gorilla*, his wife and three of his friends. That was also a good time, but could have been much better. The comics weren’t all that talented, and I’d seen the headliner at least twice before. There was way too much in the way of F-Bombs and sex jokes. The mark of a talented comic is the ability to get laughs without delving into these two crutches. In the end, I can’t complain, as the show was free. Vanilla Gorilla won 20 free tickets to the show, so it didn’t cost any of us a thing. My date had never been to a comedy club before, so it was fun to take her. I look forward to taking her to Comedy Sportz sometime, to show her that comedy clubs can be a lot more fun. CS uses local improv comics and they keep the comedy clean, clean enough that I’d have no problem taking an 8-year-old to any of their shows.

My wonderful girlfriend got me a cool Lego set for Valentine’s Day. She remembered that on our first date I mentioned that as a kid I loved Legos. The set she gave me had more pieces than all the sets I had ever gotten before put together. It was fun to put it together. I built a helicopter. She helped get it started on Saturday, and I finished it tonight.

*Vanilla Gorilla is Andy’s best friend, Dale.

Posted: Thursday, July 8, 2004

Here is an excerpt of an email I wrote Andy on February 13, 2004:

Hi Andy,

Went to lunch with colleagues. I ate way more than I planned to, but it was so good. I kept talking about you at the lunch and I’m sure everyone thinks I’m crazy since I haven’t known you for that long. I hope you don’t take offense, but sometimes I wonder if I’m crazy for being so crazy about you already.

Jessica

Here is Andy’s response:

Jess,

Don’t worry. I feel the same way, and worry about the same thing. No offense taken at all, if anything, I take it as a compliment.

A.

Posted: Monday, July 19, 2004